the elevator

An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again. The boy asked, “Father, what is this?”

 The Father (having never seen an elevator) responded, “Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life. I don’t know what it is.”

While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed, an old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls light up. They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse direction.

The walls opened up again and a beautiful 24-year-old woman stepped out. The father said to his son, “Go get your mother.”

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An old woman is riding in an elevator in a very lavish New York City building when a young, beautiful woman gets into the elevator, smelling of expensive perfume. She turns to the old woman and says arrogantly, “Romance” by Ralph Lauren, $150 an ounce!”

Then another young and beautiful woman gets on the elevator, and also very arrogantly turns to the old woman saying, “Chanel No. 5, $200 an ounce!”

About three floors later, the old woman has reached her destination and is about to get off the elevator. Before she leaves, she looks both beautiful women in the eye, then bends over and farts and says, “Broccoli – 49 cents a pound!”

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Women dream of world peace, a safe environment, and eliminating hunger. What do men dream of?

Being stuck in an elevator with the Doublemint twins.

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have an up-lifting day

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