Halloween

One dark night two men were walking home after a party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemeteryjust for laughs.

Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a  tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.

Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel,
chipping away at one of the headstones.

“Holy cow, Mister,” one of them said after catching his breath,
“You scared us half to death we thought you were a ghost!
What are you doing working here so late at night?”

“Those fools!” the old man grumbled. “They misspelled my name!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

A man is walking home alone late on Halloween night.


It’s dark, and the streetlights are out. Suddenly, he hears

BUMP!

BUMP!

BUMP!

Behind him. He walks faster, but the sound keeps coming.

BUMP!

BUMP!

BUMP!

Worried he is being followed, he glances behind him and through the
darkness, and he can just see an upright coffin.

No one seems to be holding the coffin; it’s just bumping down the street
behind him.

The man is scared. He’s sure it’s following him! In an effort to shake it off, her turns a corner. To his relief, the sound stops. He keeps walking but before a minute has passed, he hears the familiar sound behind him again:

BUMP!

BUMP!

BUMP!

He is terrified! He starts to run towards his home, but the faster he runs, the
faster the coffin bounces along behind him!

Bumpity BUMP!

Bumpity BUMP!

Bumpity BUMP!

He pushes open his front gate, and runs up the path, fumbling for his keys.
The coffin reaches the gate and effortlessly pushes it open. It’s right behind
him!!!

Finally his shaking hands manage to unlock his front door. He has no time to slam it behind him; the coffin is right on his heels! He rushes up the stairs, praying the coffin cannot climb after him.

BUMP!

BUMP!

BUMP!

The coffin pauses at the bottom of the stairs. The man breathes a sigh of relief
but …

clappity BUMP…

clappity BUMP…

clappity BUMP…

The coffin is now climbing the stairs behind him. He runs to the bathroom perhaps he can lock himself in there! His heart pounds and his lungs hurt with the exertion of running for his life! He has only just latched the bathroom door when …

CRASH!!!

The coffin breaks through the bathroom door!

What can he do? The coffin is nearly upon him! He reaches out for something heavy that he can throw at the coffin, and his hand comes to rest on a large
bottle of cough syrup.

Desperately, he throws the cough syrup as hard as he can at the coffin and

………..

………..

(Wait for it)

………..

………..

……….finally the coffin stops!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

no, you can’t be charlie sheen for halloween…

 

 

 

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