Once upon a time there was a family of storks: Papa Stork, Mama Stork, and Baby Stork. One evening, Papa wasn’t at dinner. Mama left food out for him, but he didn’t come home at all that night.
When he finally did come home the next day, Baby Stork asked, “Papa, where were you all night, last night?” Papa replied, “Out making a young couple very happy.”
Several weeks later, Mama Stork was late for dinner. Papa and Baby waited for a long while, then gave up and ordered pizza. Mama stork didn’t make it home till late the next morning.
When she tiredly sank into her favorite chair, Baby asked her, “Mama, where were you all last night?” “I was out making a young couple very happy,” she sighed.
Later that autumn, Baby was late for dinner. Papa and Mama were very concerned. Their anxiety increased when Baby still wasn’t home by sunset. They waited up late together for Baby, but he didn’t arrive home until early morning. Papa was angry. “Just where in the hell were you all night, Baby Stork?”
“Out scaring the s**t out of college students,” Baby Stork giggled.
First, cut a big hole in the ice on a frozen lake. Then open a can of peas, and spread them around the hole. Then hide, where you can watch the hole.
When the bear comes to take a pea, kick him in the ice-hole!
Two men were walking down the road and saw a dog licking its balls. The first man said, “Gee I wish I could do that.”
The second man replied, “Better pet him first. He might bite.”
hope your day is bear-able