on the farm

My Wife is a country girl who was raised up on a dairy farm. Feeding cattle and caring for the herd was how she grew up. Fresh milk everyday and with that being said she will not drink store bought milk. She say’s it doesn’t taste right? I on the other hand love a glass of milk with my breakfast. But then the other day she was telling me about her pet pig. Now this was a pot-bellied pig that stayed in the house and loved life-savers. Along with having rabbits ‘IN THE HOUSE’ and the rabbits used a litter box like cats.  Now if that ain’t country I don’t know what is.

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A Japanese rancher told reporters in Tokyo in July that he herds cattle by outfitting them with pocket pagers (beepers), which he calls from his portable phone.

After a week of training, the cows associate the beeping with eating and hustle up for grub.
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A salesman is talking to a farmer when he looks over and sees a rooster wearing pants, a shirt, and suspenders. He asks, “What on earth is that all about?”

The farmer says, “We had a fire in the chicken coop two months ago and all his feathers got singed off, so the wife made him some clothes to keep him warm.”

“Okay, but that was two months ago. Why does he still wear them?”

The farmer replied, “There ain’t nothing funnier than watching him try to hold down a hen with one foot and get his pants down with the other.”

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A husband and wife were driving down a country lane on their way to visit some friends. They came to a muddy patch in the road and the car became bogged. After a few minutes of trying to get the car out by themselves, they saw a young farmer coming down the lane, driving some oxen before him.

He stopped when he saw the couple in trouble and offered to pull the car out of the mud for $50. The husband accepted and minutes later the car was free. The farmer turned to the husband and said, “You know, you’re the tenth car I’ve helped out of the mud today.”

The husband looks around at the fields incredulously and asks the farmer, “When do you have time to plow your land? At night?”

“No,” the young farmer replied seriously, “Night is when I put the water in the hole.”

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