cannibals

Well, I’ve eaten a lot of things before, cat tacos, snails, chocolate covered grasshoppers but I don’t believe I have never eaten a man. I am not a cannibal, I have however, eaten a woman. Yummy. I don’t know where cannibals live now a days. I did hear ‘Coach’ on Survivor claims he was taken by cannibals and lived to tell about it. This was hard to believe but they did ask him to tell the story on the show and he is insistant that this happened. So, todays topic for humor is ‘Cannibals’, I found some humor while fishing for chuckles.

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Two cannibals are eating a man, one starting from the head the other from the feet.

A few minutes into their feast the one who started from the head says to the one who started at the feet,”How’s it going down their?”.

The other answers,”I’m having a ball!”.

To which the answer is,”Slow down you’re going to fast!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two cannibals meet one day. The first cannibal says, “You know, I just can’t seem to get a tender Missionary. I’ve baked them, I’ve roasted them, I’ve stewed them, I’ve barbecued them, I’ve tried every sort of marinade. I just cannot seem to get them tender.”

The second cannibal asks, “What kind of Missionary do you use?”

The other replied, “You know, the ones that hang out at that place at the bend of the river. They have those brown cloaks with a rope around the waist and they’re sort of bald on top with a funny ring of hair on their heads.”

“Ah, ha!” the second cannibal replies. “No wonder … those are friars!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An airplane full of a shipment of Pepsi flying over Africa had a malfunction, and went down. A few weeks later, the Pepsi Company sent a rescue plane. They searched the area and found a tribe of cannibals.

They walked up to the Chief of the tribe and asked him if he knew anything about the crash.

The Chief said, “You betcha!”

When asked where the crew was, the Chief replied, “We ate the crew, and we drank the Pepsi.”

The Rescue crew were shocked. One man asked, “Did you eat their legs?”

The chief replied, “We ate their legs, and we drank the Pepsi.”

Another rescuer asked, “Did you eat their arms?”

The Chief replied, “We ate their arms, and we drank the Pepsi.”

After looking totally perplexed for a minute, a third asked, “Did you…you know…eat, their…’things’?”

The chief says, “No.”

“No?” asked the rescuer.

“No,” replied the Chief, “THINGS go better with Coke.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I dreamed that I was a muffler. When I woke up I was exhausted.

the jokes on them Margaret, I just took one hellacious shit

have a great day but beware of cannibals

 

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