cb radio

In case some of you don’t know, CB stands for citizen band. The channels/ radio frequency that are allowed by the government for citizens to use. While other frequencys are for other uses… (don’t ask/ top secret) but we use to have hours of fun with the CB radio as kids and when I was a truck driver well it is a must as a driver for imformation as well as a pass time while driving.

When I was a kid I had the CB handle (name) “Squirrel.”  We would play on the radio in my father’s car. I am sure he enjoyed this as much as we did just to have us out of the house. Then when I was older, truck driving, I went by the CB name “Grasshopper” as in the movie series, ‘Kung Fu.’

I remember when I was driving, being snowed in at a TA truck stop in Dayton Ohio. I couldn’t get my rig to move because the ice had built up on the pavement, frozen solid, one big parking lot of ice. I got on the CB to kill time and wait till it thawed and I could get moving again. One old timer laughed and told me it will be spring time before it thaws. I asked how in the hell am I gonna get this truck moving?

The guy called out on the CB radio PP911. i had no idea what this was. All of a sudden two, three, ten truckers show up and they start peeing on the drive tires to melt the ice. When the ice was melted they hollared get going. I was able to get enough traction to move the big rig out of the parking lot. I hollared on the radio, “Thanks much Amigos, keep it between the ditches and don’t pick up any bad… Bit*#es. The CB radio is a valuble tool when out on the road.

allow me to say this: give truckers a break, ever tried to drive the titanic down a two lane highway? Every thing you buy at the store was hauled by a truck at one time or another, think about that.


A young kid starting his first job as a waiter in a diner has a big trucker come in and sit down at the counter and order, The trucker says “Gimme 3 flat tires and a couple of headlights.” Bewildered the kid goes to the kitchen and tells the cook, “I think this guy’s in the wrong store, look at what he ordered!” The cook says, “He wants 3 Flapjacks and 2 eggs sunny-side up.” The waiter then takes a bowl of beans to the driver. He looks at it and growls, “What’s this? I didn’t order this!” The kid tells him, “The cook says that while you’re waiting for your parts you might as well gas up while your waiting!”

An old man was eating in a truck stop when three rough-looking bikers walked in. As they passed the old man, the first biker pushed his cigarette into the old man’s pie, then laughed and took a seat at the counter. The second biker picked up the old man’s milk and spit into it. The third biker turned over the old man’s plate before joining the others at the counter.

Without saying a word to the laughing bikers, the old man put his money down, got up, and left the diner. One of the bikers said to the waitress, “Not much of a man, was he?”

The waitress replied, Not much of a truck driver either. He just backed his big rig over three motorcycles!


A trucker driving along on the freeway notices a road sign in the distance that reads Low Bridge Ahead.

Sure enough, the trucker gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles.

Finally, a police officer arrives at the scene. The cop gets out of his cruiser and walks around to the truck driver. He puts his hands on his hips and remarks, “Looks like you got stuck, huh?”

The trucker replies sarcastically, No, officer, actually I was delivering this bridge and I ran out of fuel!

a Bill Engval joke…

have a truckin good time



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