Well, here it is, the month of December and we all know what that means…
Santa Claus is coming to town
I remember when we lived in Panama (my Dad was in the air force and we were stationed there) A man came to visit my Dad. He was a “Blue Angels” pilot. He brought me a model of the Blue Angels jet. It was an exciting night as we sat around waiting for Santa Claus to come house to house and ask the kids on the base what they wanted for Christmas.
When Santa arrived, the jeep pulled up to the house and Santa got out, came in the house and my brother and I nearly fainted. He sat down and I sat on his lap and told him what I wanted for Christmas. That was when I noticed that Santa’s tummy buttons on his coat had come un-done and a pillow was sticking out of his coat. I was told many things, like; He was a Santa Helper, He had lost a lot of weight and wanted to keep up his appearance of being a jolly Santa and of course the Blue Angel pilot had the best answer of all, He was flying Santa around and wanted Santa to have extra padding in case they crashed. (grin)
What does Santa use when he goes fishing?
His north pole!
There are currently 78 people named S. Claus
living in the U.S. — and one Kriss Kringle.
(You gotta wonder about that one kid’s parents)
December is the most popular month for nose jobs.
Weight of Santa’s sleigh loaded with one Beanie Baby
for every kid on earth: 333,333 tons.
Number of reindeer required to pull a 333,333-ton s
sleigh: 214,206 — plus Rudolph.
Average wage of a mall Santa: $11 an hour.
With real beard: $20.
To deliver his gifts in one night, Santa would have to
make 822.6 visits per second, sleighing at 3,000 times
the speed of sound.
At that speed, Santa and his reindeer would burst into flame
Q: Why does Santa wear pink underwear?
A: He’s a man. He did all his laundry in the one load.
They say that Santa comes but once a year. I can’t understand that, considering all the bedrooms he visits.
What do you call someone who doesn’t believe in Father Christmas?
A rebel without a Claus!
What did Santa say to the three girls on the street corner…
Ho Ho Ho
How do Chihuahua’s say Merry Christmas?
I told Santa you were good this year….and
He hasn’t stopped laughing since!
ho ho ho and away we go… into the holiday season